Lent - A Time for Conversion

I have been thinking a lot about the season of Lent as a time of conversion; a time to turn from sin and toward wholeness and new life.  My experience is that people tend to be grouped into one of two camps.  Either we are so aware of ourselves as sinful beings that we are forever seeking reconciliation and doing penance.  The awareness of the flawed human person is so prevalent that for those in this camp, it almost impossible to be aware of our innate goodness.  On the flip side, there are those of us in the camp of unfailing forgiveness and love.  For some in this camp, to see oneself as a sinner or to simply name those ways we separate ourselves from God’s love in small and big ways is hard.

In which camp do you find yourself?  In recent years, I have been so focused on God’s love and care for me that I seem to have stumbled into the second camp.  When I come face to face with 40 days of being called to turn from my sins and follow the Gospel, I am tempted to say “phew! How bad can it be?”  And now here we are teetering on the edge of the last week of Lent.  I invite you to take a moment or two to think back on these weeks and ask God to show you signs of your conversion or turning to God. 

Lent 2017 has reinforced something I have known for while – that is that often our greatest strength or asset is also the place where we need God the most.  There are two sides to most realities.  If you are a really fine orator; well-educated and well spoken, you are probably respected and sought after as a teacher/speaker.  When you do this well, with the best motives, you really shine.  However, this ability or talent can also be turned toward a darker side. Perhaps you use your “well trained tongue” to convince people of your point of view without even hearing from someone who thinks or believes differently.  You may not even try to see things from a different perspective and in so doing, you might miss the truth.

Early in this Lenten season, someone I know and trust asked me how things were in my significant relationships.  Well, Sisters of St. Joseph take as their charism or heart message to be reconcilers and to desire and work for union with God and neighbor.  Being in relationship and really working at it is a hallmark of a good Sister of St. Joseph.  The question posed to me by my friend would not go away.  The more I prayed and the more quiet time I took, the more I realized that this would be my Lenten conversion. God was asking me what needed to be healed and more important, God was assuring me that this was God’s work, not mine.  Over the days and weeks, I asked God to be with me and to show me my heart.  I saw what needed healing and I was shown a way from the shadows of my heart to a fresh light of love and care.  

From this experience, I can identify a few elements of the call to conversion and the response.  First of all, there has to be a real desire to dive deep into one’s own experience.  This includes being able to listen and interpret the signs of God all around us.  Another element is that you have to have the confidence that God is there with you on the dive and will not leave you.  Also, the journey of conversion requires patience to really hear God and a commitment to change.  Even if God shows us the shadows of our hearts, it will mean nothing if we are not willing to do the work to turn from the dark to the light and repair the path along the way.